I hate feeling like a package that you are trying to unwrap. I know you saw me on the market and took one look at me. You saw something shiny and new. You couldn’t find a price for me, but you knew you wanted to do more than just look. You wanted to touch. So, you put me in your cart. I accepted the offer to ride around the store. Meanwhile you survey my competition and see if you want to go through with this check out. You find a price scanner and think that maybe the price I am asking is too much for what you want.
You look for the return policy. You are interested in taking me for a spin for awhile and seeing how much pleasure you can get from me before you have to send me back. You know that actually committing to a product is too much to ask. You don’t understand the concept, “if you break it, you buy it.” If that happens, you hide me in a shelf for the store employees to find later to either mark down or deem “damaged.” After all, you are still open to other options. You haven’t decided if you actually want me yet. Different brands, prices, conditions are looking better.
You learn about all of my features and benefits—but you have no real interest. You will never fully appreciate me and all of my features because to you I only serve one purpose. If I were excel, you wouldn’t know that I could create pivot tables, categorize your columns, and auto sum cells with one click. If I were a smart phone you would just use me for phone calls. Figuring out how to purchase apps and send picture texts doesn’t interest you. To you, I only have one function that you are interested in. Because you don’t explore me, I feel like you take me for granted. You don’t understand my full potential and you will never appreciate me the way I want you to. I am more expensive because you usually get the generic brand or the lowest quality. I am tired of apologizing. I have labels and if you dared to read the manual you would know what you were getting yourself into. However, you only want to see what you want to. Doing things the proper way takes too much effort and is not as fun. I don’t want to put you through the hassle of returning me. I am not a toy and I am too mature for your age group. Please proceed to the next aisle because I cannot guarantee complete satisfaction or your money back.